Sunday, January 3, 2010

Alfalfa and Shoe: This Is The First Chapter

Epilogue

“Oh man.” Sighed Alfalfa. It had been a long day. First off, he was in a desert. So, you know, that sucks. Second, he was attached to a god damn ball and chain, and proceeding to walk through a whole desert with it clamped onto his ankle.
And thirdly, he was chatting with a loud-mouthed shoe. Whose name is, remarkably, Shoe. Things are not super great for Alfalfa.

Shoe continued to hop across the desert with Alfalfa. “You know what this place needs?”
“Leather?”
“No.”
There was a silence. Alfalfa spoke. “What does this place need, then?” Alfalfa muttered “Christ.” under his breath.
“I was just thinking, you know, water? This place could use some water.” Shoe thought for a moment. “To keep us alive.”
“I don’t really think the desert cares if you are in need with a beverage, even if you weren’t a, uh. A shoe.
“Maybe.”
As they walked, they could faintly see how far the desert goes. From what they could see, it isn’t ending anytime soon. Or later. Alfalfa cursed.
Shoe shuffled around a bit. “The desert is mean, man.”
Alfalfa kept looking at the distance they must travel. “I know, little buddy.”






















Chapter One
Jeeves stared hard at the giant skyscraper before him. He dared not go in after that poor young man that entered the tower several hours before. All anyone knows about the tower is a) Doctor Quinks made it, and b) Doctor Quinks is a loony, and hardly anyone took part in or interfered in any of his strange experiments, like that boy just did. The Doctor told the kid to go into the building for a test, and Quinks said he would be greatly awarded. So, of course the boy did. The boy, who the authorities have called ‘Alfalfa’ has not come out. Police didn’t dare go in there, and are calling him a lost cause. Inspector Jeeves wanted to know more about this building and wanted to know what this building does and what it did to this Alfalfa kid. Jeeves backed away from the building and headed to Doctor Quinks’ laboratory.

Quinks laughed manically to himself. He was panicking just a while before, but luckily he had just discovered a way to get the lad out of that Gateway Building he had made. It would be completely safe, and no one, including Alfalfa, would get hurt. It is too bad that in the next paragraph, Jeeves will come crashing into the Doctor’s laboratory and interrogate him about the Gateway by smashing Doctor Quinks’ interstellar teleporter with an old pipe he found on Endings Street. But, it is a good thing Doctor Quinks is savoring his creation while it lasts, and should be pleased that things have been going well until now.

Jeeves kicked Doctor Quinks’ door down, and with a rusty pipe he found on Endings Street, interrogated the Doctor about the strange building. Of course, Quinks could not tell him anything. Jeeves threatened Quinks by saying that he will smash this device in front of him. Quinks could not tell him anything. Jeeves started to smash the machine, and would continue until Quinks would tell him something. But Quinks, of course, could not tell him anything. Although, Quinks could, in fact, tell him that Jeeves just destroyed the one machine that could bring Alfalfa safely back to Earth, and reality itself. And Quinks did tell him.
“Aw, nuts.
“So now I have to find another way to save the lad. Thanks. You jerk.”
“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place? I mea-“
“You didn’t ask.”
They stood silently for a moment.
“Can you make anothe-“
“No. Cost me thousands of dollars to make that teleporter you just smashed.”
“So I guess we will have to find another way to get him out of there. You have any other ideas?”
“Well I did, until you broke it.”
“Well, there has to be another gadget in here that will-“
“Nope.”
“Anything?”
“Nope.” He thought for a second. “Well, I have a rope. I guess.”
“That doesn’t count.”
“Oh, okay. Then nope.”
Jeeves slapped his forehead. This is going to be an awfully long day.

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